Ussy Begonia was one year old when it was determined that shewas agenius. She could speak in complete sentences, compute complexmathematicalproblems, and play a dandy jig on the fiddle, an instrument thatwas bothlarger and heavier than she was.
"What a marvelous child for God to have blessed us with,"remarkedUssy's mother, Rapacia, on more than one occasion. Ussy's father,Bert,agreed. People came from far and wide to observe the miraculousinfant withthe intellect of an adult. Ussy and her family soon grew famousthroughoutthe land and also inordinately wealthy.
Finally, just before Ussy turned two, they were summonedbefore theruler of the entire nation, King Justuss. Rapacia and Bert bothexpected theking to reward and praise them for giving birth to such aremarkable child.Only Ussy was skeptical of the entire proceedings, and voiced hercontempt anddisdain for King Justuss.
"In an ideal society," Ussy pontificated, "there would be noneed forkings, especially none as ruthless and despicable as King Justuss. Thisentire despotic system will fall one day soon, and the people willrise up ina revolution that will bring peace and fair governance to all!" Her fatherand mother nodded sagely, although they did not understand one wordof whatshe had said.
Ussy declared that she would not visit the king, so herparents stuffedher into a potato sack and carried her off to the palace, foralthough Ussywas very intelligent, she was still very small.
King Justuss was a young man; he was tiny, with a thinmustache andshort cropped black hair. He cut a dashing figure in his elegantclothes andbright red sash. His father had died eight years earlier, when hewassixteen, and King Justuss had ruled the kingdom severely sincethen. He wasan extremely petty man, and he feared that one day the intellect ofUssyBegonia would make her a formidable enemy. Thus, when Rapacia andBert tookUssy out of the potato sack and laid her before the regent, KingJustuss tookhis scepter and struck a tremendous blow to the side of Ussy'shead.
"That will teach her!" her cried, as the baby's blood andbrains sprayedthe faces of the onlookers. "That will teach all of you!"
Rapacia and Bert started weeping then, and were banished fromthe land. Before they fled, however, Rapacia noticed that Ussy was not dead,so shesecretly took her mangled infant home with her, not to bury, asKing Justussthought, but to nurture back to health. Unfortunately, Ussy hadlapsed into acoma, from which no one could awaken her.
"Oh, Ussy!" cried her mother. "Won't you please wake up!" But herwords had no effect.
Thirty years later, Ussy was still in a vegetative state. Theinjuryhad also stunted her growth, so she never grew much bigger than asmall child. Although Bert had died long before, Rapacia was still alive andtendedpatiently to her damaged daughter. Rapacia was now a haggard oldcrone, andknew that her days would soon be at an end. Much had changedthroughout theland during her lifetime, and the world was a very different placethan itonce had been. King Justuss had been deposed, just as Ussy hadprophesied,and he was now forced to wander the land alone, an outcast in thevery countryhe had once ruled. The people had indeed risen up, and abenevolent committeeof equals controlled the fate of the nation.
Eventually, Rapacia grew sick and knew that her time was athand, so shesent out a message that she needed someone, anyone, to marry herdaughter andtake care of her.
At first, no one came to propose to Ussy, and Rapacia becameweaker andweaker. One day, just as she was losing hope, a man arrived at thedoor.
He had a massive gray beard that was flecked with particles offood andclumps of grease. His hair had evidently not been cut in years, asit hungraggedly halfway down his back. Both of his eyes were tiny andbloodshot, andthey twitched constantly, giving the impression of completeinsanity. Hisshoulders were hunched over, as if he had been beatenrepeatedly.
"I wish to marry your daughter," the man said, and a nervoustitterescaped his lips. The sound was so eerie that it made hackles riseon theback of Rapacia's withered neck. Still, he was the only suitor toshow up sofar, Rapacia realized, and the only one who probably everwould.
"Ussy," the man breathed, and as he knelt down and touched thecrippled,silent body, a strange occurrence took place. Ussy's eyesflickered, and thenopened.
"Ussy! Ussy!" wept her mother. "Oh thank God, you havereturned to us!" But something terrible had happened to Ussy during the time thatshe'd spentin a coma. When she woke up, it became evident that her superiorintellecthad fled.
"Mama," Ussy said. "Me want Mama."
At this, the little bearded man began to laugh and laugh andlaugh. Hisround shoulders jiggled up and down, and tears ran down his faceand into hisbeard.
"Stop that!" shrieked Rapacia, "Oh you must stop that!"
"Mama," Ussy gurgled. "Me love Mama, Mama, Mama!" The man inthe beardleaned down and slowly picked up Ussy's crippled body.
"Mother, do not fear," he told Rapacia soberly, although asmile stilllingered on his face. "I will treat her like a queen." With that,he strodefrom the place, holding Ussy in his arms, and the two lived happilyeverafter.
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